Motivation and The Power of not
giving up
|
http://www.kidshealth.org/teen/food_fitness/exercise/motivation.html |
Have you ever
tried to lose weight, make honor roll, get picked for a team, or challenge
yourself by reaching some other goal? Like lots of people, maybe you started
out doing great, but then lost some of that drive and had trouble getting
motivated again.
You're
Not Alone! The reality is
that refocusing, changing, or making a new start on something, no matter how
small, is a big deal. But it's not impossible. With the right approach, you can
definitely do it.
Getting
- and Staying - Motivated First,
know your goal.
Start by writing down your major goal. Your major goal is the ultimate thing
you'd like to see happen. For example, "I want to make honor roll," or "I want
to lose weight in time for prom," or even, "I want to play in the Olympics" are
all major goals because they're the final thing the goal setter wants to see
happen (obviously, some goals take longer and require more work than others).
It's OK to dream big - this is how many people accomplish stuff. You just have
to remember that the bigger the goal, the more work it takes to get there.
Make
it specific.
It's easier to plan for and master a specific goal than a vague one. Let's say
your goal is to lose weight. That's pretty vague. Make it specific by defining
how much weight you want to lose, why, and by when. This helps you make a plan
to reach your goal. It takes longer to lose 20 pounds than 5, so you'll have to
build in more time for that.
Make
it realistic.
People often abandon their goals because their expectations are unreasonable.
Maybe they expect to get ripped abs in weeks rather than months, or to quit
smoking easily after years of lighting up. Let's say you want to run a
marathon. If you try to run the entire distance of 26.2 miles tomorrow without
any training, you're unlikely to succeed. It takes the average person 4 months
of training to run that far! But the bigger risk is that you'll get so bummed
out that you'll give up your marathon dreams - and running - altogether.
Part of staying
motivated is being realistic about what you can achieve within the timeframe
you've planned. Losing 10 pounds in time for prom is doable if it's a month
away. But if prom is this Saturday, it's impossible to lose that much weight in
time. Likewise, competing on the Olympic ski team is a workable goal if you are
15 and already a star skier. But if you're 18 and only just taking your first
lesson, time isn't exactly on your side.
Write
it down. Put
your specific goal in writing. Then write it down again. And again. Research
shows that writing down a goal is part of the mental process of committing to
it. Write your goal down every day to keep you focused and remind you how much
you want it.
Break
it down. Making
any change takes self-discipline. You need to pay constant attention so you
don't get sidetracked. One way to make this easier is to break a big goal into
small steps. Let's go back to our example of losing 10 pounds in time for prom:
Say you have a month to go, so your goal is reachable. But how do you actually
go about it?
First break your
goal into smaller mini-goals (like losing 3 pounds the first 2 weeks and 2
pounds a week after that). Then set specific daily tasks, like eating five
servings of fruit and veggies and getting 30 minutes of exercise a day. Put
these on a calendar or planner so you can check them off.
It's the same
process if your goal is to run a marathon. Let's say it's February and the
marathon is in August - a realistic timeframe to prepare. Start by planning to
run 2 miles and work up gradually to the distance you need. Ask a coach to help
you set doable mini-goals for additional mile amounts and for tasks to improve
your performance, such as exercises to build strength and stamina so you'll
stay motivated to run farther.
Reaching
frequent, smaller goals is something to celebrate. It gives you the confidence,
courage, and motivation to keep dieting, running, or doing whatever it is
you're aiming to do, so reward yourself!
Write down small
goals too, so you can track what you need to do, check off tasks as you
complete them, and enjoy knowing that you're moving toward your big goal.
(Writing down specific steps has another advantage - if you're feeling weak on
willpower you can look at your list to help you refocus!
Heck
in with your goal.
Now that you've broken your goal down into a series of mini-goals and daily
tasks, check in every day.
As you
accomplish a task, check it off on your list. Tell yourself, "Hey, I've lost 4
pounds, I'm nearly halfway to my goal!" Reward yourself with something you
promised yourself when you set your goal. Feel successful - you are! Now think
ahead to accomplishing the rest of your goal: "Now how am I going to take care
of the last 6 pounds without gaining back the 4 I've lost?"
Recommit
to your goal if you slip up.
If you slip up, don't give up. Forgive yourself and make a plan for getting
back on track. Pat yourself on the back for everything you did right. Don't
beat yourself up, no matter how far off track you get. Most people slip up when
trying to make a change - it's a natural part of the process.
Writing down
daily tasks and mini-goals helps here too - because by keeping track of things,
you'll quickly recognize when you've slipped up, making it easier to refocus
and recommit to your goal. And you know exactly where you went wrong. So
instead of feeling discouraged and saying, "It never works when I try to lose
weight," you can say, "I'm not losing weight because I didn't make a daily diet
plan."
What if you keep
slipping up? Ask yourself if you're really committed to your goal. If you are,
recommit - and put it in writing. The process of writing everything down may
also help you discover when you're not really committed to a goal. For example,
perhaps you're more in love with the fantasy of being a star athlete than the
reality of working for it.
View slip-ups as
lessons and reminders of why you're trying to make a change. When you mess up,
it's not a fault - it's an opportunity to learn something new about yourself.
Say your goal is to fight less with your brother or sister. You may learn that
it's better to say, "I can't talk about this right now" and take time to calm
down when you feel your temper growing out of control.
Keep
a stick-to-it attitude.
Visualize yourself achieving your goal: a slim you in your prom dress, or a
successful you scoring the winning soccer goal. Self-visualization helps you
keep what you're trying to accomplish in mind. It helps you believe it's
possible. You can also call up your mental picture when willpower and
motivation are low.
Positive
self-talk also boosts your attitude and motivation. Tell yourself, "I deserve
to make the honor roll because I've really been working hard" or "I look great
in these shorts - I'm doing well on my exercise and diet plan!"
Another boost is
having supportive people around you. Find a running buddy, a weight-loss buddy,
or someone else with a similar goal so you can support each other. Having a
goal buddy can make all the difference in times when you don't feel motivated -
like getting up for that early-morning run.
If you're not
getting support from someone when you really need it, you may need to take a
break from that friendship and surround yourself with people who want to help
you succeed. For instance, if you've been going to your friend's house to study
together every Thursday after school, but now your pal is turning on the TV,
IMing friends online, or gabbing on the phone and ignoring your pleas to get
down to work, it's time to find another study buddy. You can't stay focused on
your goal if your friend doesn't share that goal - or, even worse, is trying to
hold you back. Seek out others who are on the same path you are and work with
them instead.
Don't
Give Up! |